


Something Rainbow This way comes

by xompeii



Category: King Falls AM (Podcast)
Genre: Hair Dyeing, M/M, Recovery, Therapy visits, jack has some thoughts, listen, sometimes you include fictional therapists from other podcasts, they are not good
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2019-08-20
Packaged: 2020-09-18 20:01:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20318683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xompeii/pseuds/xompeii
Summary: “If I ask you to help me with something you might think is silly, would you still wanna help?” Jack says.“Of course I would.” Sammy makes a face, somewhere between happy and confused, and Jack has to think hard to figure out if it’s an okay face from Sammy. “What is it?”“I wanna dye my hair.”Jack and Sammy dye their hair so Jack can feel better about himself.





	Something Rainbow This way comes

**Author's Note:**

> This has been sitting on the back burner for a while, but I wanted to share this here to celebrate AO3 (and all of us) winning a Hugo Award. Congratulations winners!

Jack stood in front of the mirror for a long time. Sammy was waiting in the living room. Ben wasn’t home. His hair was shorter now, Sammy and Lily had taken him to the barber a town over to get it cut. But he still couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t stand his face anymore, not when half the time he still saw flickers of blackness in his eyes and saw the tar-like stains of the shadowmakers blood there. He was gone. Jack was free, but even in the mirror, he saw himself as he had been in that place. 

Sammy was taking him to therapy now. A few weeks after Jack got back, Ben and Lily spend a few nights out of the apartment to give them the chance to be alone together. So they were alone getting ready to go.

Jack let his hand reach out and touch the mirror. He let out a low breath and stepped back. willed himself not to throw up at the mere sight of himself, and walked into Sammy and Ben’s apartment. He closed his eyes for half a second.

It hadn’t even been a month. There were some things to look forward too. Getting his cast off, since he’d broken his leg the night he got free. He still had to use crutches most days, He could navigate the apartment with his casted foot in a boot, but going anywhere else meant lugging around crutches in case he put too much strain on his leg. It also meant he couldn’t really do much to get back to the shape he was in before. Then there was the wedding that he and Sammy spent more time talking around than about it seemed. 

Sammy looked up from his phone when he noticed Jack was stopped in the doorway, “What’s wrong?”

Jack shook his head. He could feel his hair flop around and he hated it. “I’m fine.”

Jack knows that Sammy knows it’s a lie, but he’s grateful that Sammy only just stands and offers him his hand. “Okay,” He nods. 

They live in a second-floor apartment, there is no elevator, so Sammy helps Jack slowly down the stairs. The dependency is something Jack hates as well. He can barely wait for the cast to come off, just so he doesn’t have Sammy looking at him like that. Or at least so he can walk ahead of him so he doesn’t see it.

Sammy doesn’t help him into the car anymore, just holds the door. He smiles softly as he walks around to the other side and slides in. “After this, we should get breakfast.”

“Sure,” Jack says softly. They only stop they make is at the little hole in the wall coffee spot. The one that has the little pride flag stuck in a clear cup filled with coffee beans. Jack doesn’t remember his order from before, he’s been bouncing around the menu for weeks. He doesn’t mind it anymore, his tongue is getting used to the taste of coffee again. It’s not perfect, but he’s happy that when he hears the whispers of strangers he doesn’t have to worry about Sammy getting anxious when he tucks himself into his side.

The therapist's office is quiet. Her receptionist smiles warmly at them as they sign them in. “Dr. B had an emergency meeting this morning. There may be a slight delay in seeing you both.”

They sit, and they wait and it’s supposed to be Sammy’s appointment time when the therapist walks out with a girl with fiery red hair. Jack doesn’t realize until after she’s gone that he wants to dye his hair. He has a moment in his head when he has the realization. Just something there suddenly. 

Just as suddenly as the thought enters his head, he’s distracted for a second. Sammy’s hand squeezing his knee and a second later he kisses Jack’s cheek. Jack watches him go into the office and waits there patiently. Bouncing between thoughts about what he’s going to talk about, and about hair colors. Then Sammy’s back, A little faster than Jack expected. 

“You can talk more,” Jack says softly. Glancing at the clock, Sammy didn’t get a full appointment. 

“I’m doing really good right now.” Sammy tells him, “I’ll wait out here and we can get breakfast when you’re done.”

“You’re sure?” Jack asks.

“Yeah.” Sammy says, “Yeah, I’m okay, you go talk to her. I’ll be here when you’re done.” 

Dr. B lets him into her office and smiles warmly. He’s already done with the coffee he got on the way in. She offers him a new one and he shakes his head instead of refilling his cup. He holds onto it as she starts chatting with him. 

He hasn’t been able to talk about the void yet. Mostly they talk about how he feels being back. They broached the topic of before. The 8 years he’d spent in the closet with Sammy bouncing from studio to studio, and never setting down roots. He’s not particularly fond of the idea of reflecting on that yet. 

It’s about 10 minutes into the session he finally says, “I don’t remember what my favorite color is.”

She doesn’t look shocked to hear it, nodding along, “From before?”

“I thought it was red, but I don’t think it is anymore.” He sits back a bit in the seat, “I want to dye my hair like that girl from before, but I don’t know what color.” 

“When did you decide you wanted to dye your hair?” She smiles at him and leans forward a bit, and Jack is relieved that he can talk about something lighter. So he starts talking about it. With her. 

The session is over before he knows it. He’s surprised when the receptionist knocks on the door and lets Dr. B know that her next patient is waiting. It’s surprising since Sammy is the first appointment in the morning, and there’s never been anyone waiting when they’d left. “I’ll see you next time, and hopefully you’ll have picked a color, maybe two.”

“Two?” Jack has to think for a moment, but he realizes that he really could, “Maybe.”

Sammy is waiting for him again, playing on his phone, but he looks up at Jack with absolute warmth in his features. And Jack almost trips when he sees him. He mutters something about how much he hates his cast as he manages to walk over to him and take one of his crutches. Sammy holds the other as he stands, “I’ve gotta fill my prescription, I can just run into the store after breakfast, won’t take long.”

“I wanna get something at the store.” Jack tells him, “I think I do.” 

“You two will be back next Thursday?” Dr. B says it like a question, but Jack knows it’s more of a reminder. She escorts her next patient back into her office and waves them off. A sweet smile and a nod to Jack.

They stop at Rose’s which is busier than normal, but Sammy doesn’t seem to mind as they wait for their food.

“What’s today to make things so busy?” Jack rubs his face a little and turns to look at Sammy. He missed last nights show, so he doesn’t really know if there’s an event or something going on. 

“Frickard’s got shut down because they couldn’t provide a source for where they got their frogs.”

“I thought they caught them in the lake?” Jack glances around again, and yeah, he’s pretty sure a few of these guys can be considered himinists. “So he’s shut down?”

“Yes.” Sammy smiles, “I made so many complaints about it the FDA finally checked.”

“Wait, why?”

“I hate Greg.” Sammy says simply, “There is no one I hate more.”

“Should I ask?” Jack says.

“I will tell you, but not today.”

Rose swings by with pancake puppies and a stack of pancakes for both of them. “I’ll have Rachel get you both some coffee when she gets a minute.”

“You need some help, Rose?” Jack asks.

“You asking for a Job, sugar?” She levels a look at him, “It’ll be fine in a couple hours. Don’t you worry. Just had Trevor call out sick is all. Second Archie told me Froggy’s was getting shut I hired on a few extra hands.” She reaches over and Pat’s Sammy’s cheek, “owe you a favor, but how ‘bout we call it with breakfast on the house this morning, huh?”

“I’m paying.” Sammy says, “I did this for the town, not just you.”

“You did it for yourself and I’m just rewarding the self-care.” She waves him off as she walks away.

Sammy doesn’t make a big attempt to argue. He just shrugs it off and lets her go. He hooks his ankle to Jack’s non-casted one under the table before they dig into their breakfast. Jack finds that he’s distracted enough with trying to think of hair colors that he manages to clear his plate and eat a few of the pancake puppies as well. He only stops when he sees how Sammy’s beaming at him. 

“What’s got you so hungry?”

“Distracted.” Jack excuses. He frowns, “If I ask you to help me with something you might think is silly, would you still wanna help?”

“Of course I would.” Sammy makes a face, somewhere between happy and confused, and Jack has to think hard to figure out if it’s an okay face from Sammy. “What is it?”

“I wanna dye my hair.” 

Sammy blinks in surprise, but he nods a second later, “Okay, what color?”

“I don’t know yet, but I don’t want to go full rainbow, that’s too much.” He stabs a fork into another pancake puppy and takes a bite as he thinks, “I don’t remember my favorite color anymore, and I don’t think it’s red anymore.”

“How about we grab a couple of bottles and do some test strands after we bleach it?”

“I like that idea.” Jack glances around the still full room. “Do you know how to do hair or should we ask Emily or Ben?”

“I messed with hair dyeing before we met, but I can ask Ron.”

Ron seems to be Sammy’s go-to gay guy. Anything remotely close to queer but beyond Sammy’s depth of knowledge he usually offers up asking Ron. Ben is his general knowledge guy with anything tech, and Troy is always there for everything else. It’s Sammy’s scale of people smarter than him. Jack’s happy for it too since his three friends collectively know enough to keep Sammy from getting mad and accidentally breaking something in an attempt to figure it out himself. One more of those new things that he hasn’t had an opportunity to ask about. 

“Maybe we just use google this time?” He’s not going to say he’s jealous of Ron at this moment, but he doesn’t really want to involve anyone else. Especially since they’re already going to have to involve Ben before anyone else finds out. 

He can always dye his hair black over anything that looks horrible and no one would ever know.

“Yeah.” Sammy offers him the last pancake puppy, but Jack shakes his head, he’s full for once. Properly so to the point where he actually feels like he doesn’t need anything. Sammy still leaves enough to pay for the meal on the table. He stops and kisses Rose’s cheek and waves at Not-Elvis who’s working in the kitchen. Jack lets Rose hug him before following after Sammy, hobbling along to the car. They drive to the CVS and park, Jack wanders over to the hair dye section, he grabs bleach, gloves and a couple of brushes to get the stuff in his hair.

Sammy walks over to him after he’s put in his prescription and waits for Jack to acknowledge him before wrapping his arms around his waist and pressing a kiss into his neck, “What are you thinking of?”

“I don’t know what color I want anymore,” Jack says.

“What if we get all of them?”

“I don’t want a rainbow.”

“We’ll pick something at home.”

Jack lets himself lean back a bit. “I think I want blue, but also I want purple.”

“Let’s get both.”

“But what if I do want red?”

“We’ll get all three.”

Jack makes a noise of dismay, “That’s too many.”

“I could always dye my hair with you. You could put it in mine while you bleach yours. Test the colors out.”

“Oh  _ no _ .” Jack turns around to look at him, “You could go full rainbow while I decide you know.”

“Full rainbow man bun.” Sammy smiles, “Ben will have twice as much to make fun of.”

“Is it bad that I can picture it?” Jack lets his hands reach up and run over the Back of Sammy’s head. His hair is all pulled up into his bun. When they’re home Jack usually tugs it out of the bun and runs his hands through it. Brushing it with his fingers. Ben has teased them both about this, lightly enough not to make Jack feel bad, but enough to usually have a pillow flying in his direction from Sammy. 

“Okay, let's do all the colors, and we can really decide when we get home.”

Sammy picks out a full rainbow of colors. Which means going with multiple brands, unfortunately. They ended up waiting for an extra 10 minutes at the pharmacy counter before paying for it all in the back of the store.

Back home Sammy and Jack sit in the bathroom with the fan on watching a youtube tutorial on how to bleach hair with the brand they’d picked. They found a guy doing the tutorial with his boyfriend, which was nice to see at the top of the search results. 

Sammy set to work on Jacks hair, having him sit with the computer, turned around on the toilet in the bathroom.

Jack settles on making Sammy listen to a podcast about Resurrection Mary as he scrolls through twitter. The smell of bleach makes them crack open a window and up the speed of the fan. When Jack’s hair is all tin foiled up, Jack switches with Sammy and has to take a moment not to freak out about possibly ruining Sammy’s hair.

“What if it’s bad?” Jack asks.

“It’ll wash out eventually.” Sammy says, “You watched the tutorial, I trust you.”

“Can we watch it one more time?”

Sammy turns around slightly, “Would you rather only do it to the underparts of my hair? So I can wear it down if it’s bad?”

Jack thinks for a minute, a full head of rainbow hair would be nice to look at, but he knows Sammy well enough to know there would be times when he’d be too anxious to want people to see it. It doesn't matter how far he’s come now, sometimes that anxiety can be just as crippling. He nods and starts separating out the parts of Sammy’s hair.

Sammy is kind enough to start tearing up the tin foil, and Jack tries to go as quickly as possible when he feels his head start to itch a bit from the bleach. 

Sammy has his own hair tin foiled when he helps Jack rinse out the bleach. It’s enough, when Jack sees his face in the mirror right after, to distract him from what he had been seeing for the last month. Enough that he could’ve stopped there, but he still wanted that shocking color as well. 

When Sammy rinses the color out Jack manages to find a blow dryer, it’s tucked away under the sink behind a few rolls of toilet paper. He examines the colors and puts it up into a man bun in a way that makes it look like Sammy has a rainbow coming down to his neck.

“Purple,” Jack says to him.

“Really?” Sammy grabs the box of dye and looks at the result list, “How dark do you want it?”

“I think we can add some conditioner to get a lighter tone.” It doesn’t take much for them to figure out how to adjust the color from the shade on the box to a color Jack wants. They mix it in a paper bowl and Sammy starts brushing it into Jack’s hair, new podcast playing, when the door into the apartment opens and Ben calls out a quick greeting followed almost immediately by a comment about the smell.

Emily finds them first because Ben is opening windows up. She smiles when she sees Sammy’s hair, and Jack can see it in the mirror. “You guys look like you’re having fun.”

“Oh yeah,” Sammy beams at her. Brighter than Jack’s seen since the first few days he’d been back. He’s still got his hair up. 

Ben slides into the doorway while Sammy gets back to work making sure he doesn’t miss anything. “Oh my god.” His hand reaches up and from what Jack can see in the mirror he stops himself from actually touching Sammy’s hair, “Whose idea was this?”

“Mine,” Jack says softly. “Sammy offered to test the colors on his hair.”

Ben’s entire face lights up. He finally reaches over and touches Sammy’s hair, Sammy to his credit doesn’t really react to it aside from a brief pause in what he’s doing to Jack’s hair.

“Wait so why did you want to dye your hair?” Ben asks, hopping onto the counter after making some space for himself.

“I needed something different.” Jack says, “I just, I couldn’t deal with-” He pauses. He knows how bad it sounds to say out loud, but he’s already plenty fucked up from what happened to him, “I needed a distraction when I looked in the mirror.”

Sammy leans around and kisses him on the neck. When he stands up again there’s a streak of purple across his face. He laughs as he grabs for the wet wipes they’re using and swipes it off. “You’re good, just have to wait an hour to rinse.”

“So you did this all while Emmy and I were-” Ben pauses, and rightly doesn’t finish that sentence while Jack turns around. Jack has lived here long enough to know exactly what they get up to when alone, and yet not long enough for Ben to know how to tell when he and Sammy are doing the exact same thing. “Right yeah, this was probably more fun.”

Sammy snorts behind Ben. “Believe me, the second Jack has his cast off we’re going to have  _ a lot _ of fun.”

It turns out just the way Jack wanted. Sammy makes notes on his phone so they can replicate the color when it starts to fade. Snapping photos of the dye bottle Jack picked and the conditioner they used. Jack can’t stop feeling it. He runs his hands through it so many times that there's a faint purple tone to his skin. 

It helps a lot. Maybe not completely, but Jack thinks more about his hair when he sees himself in the mirror than he did about the first time he saw his reflection at the hospital. He can actually stand to see himself now. 

Sammy gets a lot of attention for his hair too. More than Jack when he’s got it up. Like people know to talk to Sammy about his hair instead of bringing their attention to him. Those obvious looks of pity are starting to fade from the public perception of him. By the time he has his cast off he’s dyed it again, the same purple, but a bit darker to hold the color longer.

Sammy lets him do his rainbow over, just so they can use up the dyes they bought. But pride month rolls in, and Jacks pretty sure he leaves his hair up all month. 

It gets easier. Every week as he stops talking about the easy things with Dr. B and starts talking to her about the serious things. She doesn’t flinch away from his description of the void, doesn’t ask him what he means by it. She takes it at face value, and maybe that’s why Sammy likes her. Because he knew she’d let Jack talk about bigfoot, and apparitions, and wouldn’t try and put him on something for that.

Lily even asks him to do her hair, but then decides against it because “they’re twins” and “that's cliche”. Katie declines the offer, citing that she wants to be taken seriously as a deputy. He’s pretty sure she’s being polite, but he doesn’t mind. The hair can be his thing. His and Sammy’s thing. Until he doesn’t want to do it anymore.


End file.
